Past is past...

I read my previous posts in the blog and I had mixed feelings... But I don't want to edit them.  Those posts are about my feelings at that particular moment, so I am going to keep them as they are.

It is kind of weird.

Anyway,

I gave him my blog's link. Sth. that I would've never done when I lived with my ex-husband. 

He didn't even ask for it, but I gave it to him myself! and he said he deleted it because I might have doubts to let him read my blog.  To be honest I would never do the same... If it was me, I would read all the post carefully. :-)

I am waiting for the moment I meet him after all these 14 years. I don't know how it is going to be...

I was thinking he is my biggest risk as a matter of material life, but as a lover... I feel quite safe.  I don't know how difficult it would be.  Am I ready for this long process? I don't know... It depends on him.  I need to see him tries his best.

Some of my friends warn me he might not be my best choice among the options I have... but I ask myself: "He is not a good choice as a matter of what? If I go to a relationship with a Norwegian it wouldn't be the same feeling. I don't feel I can be 100% Norwegian."

I have been wise enough all these years, now I want to be wild!  Yes! I am not too young to make another mistake, but I will try to build everything right from scratch.  I want to love my partner, not to go to a relationship and say: let's try to create love and passion. What if the guy is not the person I can love?! What if his personality is so different like my Ex that I can never feel the love and passion?!  This is the most important thing for me, specially after my first marriage experience I would never risk to be WISE!

I am looking forward to the future...